petercapalldii:

don’t you hate it when you sneeze so hard that you regenerate

awwww-cute:

A friend was travelling through Laos and Vietnam and met this little fella

awwww-cute:

A friend was travelling through Laos and Vietnam and met this little fella

nebulizard:

shout out to everybody who has school soon

i believe in you

you will be excellent this year

and if you’re not that’s ok too it doesn’t mean you’re not smart

just remember to take care of yourself because your mental health is more important than your grades ok?

group hug ily all

commandersheena:

israfel070:

modestdemidov:

"make up is false advertisement!"

translation:

"i view women as products"

If you went on a few dates with a charming, fit-looking guy, decided to invite him upstairs, and after he took off his shirt he unstrapped a hidden girdle and his massive gelatinous kegbelly rippled forth, you would be pissed too.

did you really just compare a woman putting some powder on her face to a guy literally reshaping his entire body

tarargh:

i only have two speed settings for blogging: “makes you wonder if theyre even still active” or “your entire dash is nothing but me”

illeg-al:

tip of the day don’t vacuum with ear phones in because i just finished vacuuming the whole house only to realise it wasn’t even on

deaneggsandsam:

how nerds dirty talk to each other

deaneggsandsam:

how nerds dirty talk to each other

topfunnystuff:

Every time I see this, I can’t tell if he’s referencing the dog or the dad and it’s funny either way 

topfunnystuff:

Every time I see this, I can’t tell if he’s referencing the dog or the dad and it’s funny either way 

hod-the-blind:

dx11:

mancermechro:

not sure why people don’t automatically say “shapeshifting” when asked what they want their superpower to be. you could become anyone you want. even fictional characters. anyone. cosplay would always be spot-on. dysphoria wouldn’t exist. perfection

rob a bank and disguise yourself as a stray pen lying on a shelf when the cops come

A pen with a shit ton of money lying next to it.

bidyke:

barbidreamdumpster:

if you want to ask a bisexual or asexual person about their sexual history to verify that they’re queer, but you don’t want them to take it the wrong way, try this useful communication technique:

give them twenty dollars and go away.

As a bi person, I can attest to the beneficiality of this method.